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Debunking the Royal Curtsy: What the Protocol Really Means

Unpacking centuries of royal etiquette—why that famed curtsy isn’t mandatory and how tradition, hierarchy, and myth still shape the modern monarchy.

By Sneha Tete, Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach

Created on Aug 28, 2025

Unpacking centuries of royal etiquette—why that famed curtsy isn’t mandatory and how tradition, hierarchy, and myth still shape the modern monarchy.

Debunking the Royal Curtsy: Fact, Fiction, and Tradition

For centuries, the simple act of bowing or curtsying to a British royal has fascinated and perplexed the public. From dramatic scenes in historical dramas to modern paparazzi capturing a hesitant dip, the curtsy stands as a symbol of royal respect—yet few understand what’s required, what is myth, and what simply comes down to personal choice. This article guides you through the complex landscape of royal curtsy etiquette, drawing a clear line between tradition and actual protocol. We explore the origins of the curtsy, the real rules for royals and the public, recent changes in the royal hierarchy, and persistent misconceptions surrounding one of the monarchy’s most recognized (but misunderstood) gestures.

The Historical Origins of the Royal Curtsy
What the Modern Royal Rulebook Says
Is Curtsying Actually Mandatory?
Hierarchy and the Realities of Royal Precedence
Unique Cases: When Rules Change
The Debate: Expert Views and Public Perceptions
How to Curtsy: Practical Tips from Royal Experts
FAQs

The Historical Origins of the Royal Curtsy

The curtsy is rooted in centuries-old European modes of greeting and deference, particularly prevalent among women in aristocratic and royal settings. Traditionally, it replaced the male bow as a means for women to convey respect to figures of authority. Its depth and grace reflected both skill and a willingness to demonstrate deference in a visible, bodily way.

This tradition survived into the modern era, fueled by its continued depiction at court and ceremonial occasions. In its deepest form, the curtsy was an act of display and submission; in time, a small, subtle bob of the knee carried the same significance, albeit with a nod to practicality and modern tastes.

What the Modern Royal Rulebook Says

Contrary to popular belief, no written law or strict compendium demands that anyone—royal or otherwise—must bow or curtsy to members of the royal family. The official royal website clarifies that “there are no obligatory codes of behaviour when meeting the Queen or a member of the Royal Family,” though it acknowledges traditional greetings as a courtesy.

Men traditionally perform a neck bow (a gentle nod of the head).
Women may give a small curtsy if they so wish.
Increasingly, a simple handshake is also accepted, reflecting societal changes.

The emphasis from the palace is on individual comfort and the maintenance of respect, rather than following rigid, archaic rituals.

Is Curtsying Actually Mandatory?

This persistent myth enjoys endless cycles of debate whenever the royals grace a public event. However, according to etiquette experts and former royal staff, the act of curtsying or bowing is not compulsory—even for British citizens.

Refusals to curtsy, like those by former British Prime Minister Theresa May or Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard, have made headlines but were met with neither outcry nor retribution. Gillard herself explained that protocol allowed a head bow or curtsy as options, leaving it entirely to personal comfort.

Key Point: No member of the public is under any royal obligation to curtsy or bow. Doing so is a gesture of respect, not a requirement.

Hierarchy and the Realities of Royal Precedence

Within the royal family, precedence—the order in which one royal ranks compared to another—historically influenced when and to whom curtsies are performed. In 2005, a document titled the ‘Precedence of the Royal Family to be Observed Court’ outlined the nuances of this ranking system, particularly for royal women.

Some key points from historical and recent protocol:

Blood Princesses: Women born into royalty (e.g., Princess Anne, Princess Beatrice, Princess Eugenie) held higher precedence than those who married in (like Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall before she became Queen, or Catherine, Princess of Wales).
Curtsying was required by women marrying into the royal family, and sometimes subject to further caveats depending on who accompanied them—if higher-ranking princes were present, the order could shift.
Upon the accession of King Charles III, Queen Camilla ultimately outranked all other female royals, changing the rules yet again—now, all royal women are technically required to curtsy to her.

Royal Rank	Curtsy Requirement	Key Notes
Queen or King	All others should curtsy/bow	The sovereign is always at the top of protocol
Queen Consort (e.g., Camilla)	Outranks other women when King is on the throne	Curtsy no longer required ‘up’ the chain
Blood Princesses (Anne, Beatrice, Eugenie)	Curtsy from women who married in, except when accompanied by higher rank	Protocol can change based on who is present
Wives of Princes (Kate, Meghan, Sophie)	Curtsy to ‘blood princesses’ unless with their husbands	Protocol updated in 2012 for Kate

Despite these rules existing on paper and in tradition, experts clarify that behind closed doors, what the royals do may differ, and the whole process is much less rigid than the public assumes.

Unique Cases: When Rules Change

Camilla’s Changing Status

After marrying then-Prince Charles in 2005, Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, was required to curtsy to royal women born into the family. However, following the death of Queen Elizabeth II and Charles’s accession, Camilla’s status shifted—now, as Queen Consort, she outranks all other royal women and is not required to curtsy to anyone in the family.

Princess Anne and Mandatory Curtsying

A notable exception in the curtsy debate is Princess Anne. New entrants to the royal family, such as Kate and Meghan, were required to curtsy to Anne regardless of whether they were accompanied by their husbands. This underscores her unique authority and rank as the only daughter of the reigning monarch.

Curtsy Dynamics for New Royal Women

Meghan Markle, upon marrying Prince Harry, had to navigate complex rules of curtsy: required when alone but exempt with Harry present for some family members.
Updates in 2012 specifically altered protocol for Kate Middleton upon her marriage to Prince William, further illustrating how these traditions can adapt with circumstance.

Throughout, the unifying principle is that these gestures are often more symbolic than strictly enforced.

The Debate: Expert Views and Public Perceptions

The royal curtsy continues to stir debate, even among experts. Some argue that the rules are simple—”Royal Highnesses bow and curtsy only to Majesties,” according to experts like Joe Little—while others insist the subtleties of rank, presence, and occasion make things far more complicated.

Public perception, amplified by media and entertainment, often overstates the rigidity of these rules. High-profile missteps or refusals to curtsy regularly make headlines, fostering more confusion. Yet, in practice, royals themselves may treat the process with more informality and focus on respect rather than ritual.

How to Curtsy: Practical Tips from Royal Experts

If you do choose to curtsy, etiquette coaches and former palace staff recommend:

Small and Simple is Best: Aim for a controlled bob of the knee, not a theatrical plunge to the floor.
Hands by Side: Keep your hands at your sides (unless shaking hands). Avoid elaborate gestures or twirls.
Back Straight, Head Bowed Slightly: Good posture without exaggeration expresses both respect and assurance.
The Duchess of Sussex and Princess of Wales are often cited as models of the proper modern royal curtsy.

Fun Fact: Royal children, such as Prince George and Princess Charlotte, are taught to bow or curtsy to the sovereign from the age of five, typically performing the gesture once when meeting and once on departing.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do you have to curtsy to a royal?

No. There is no obligatory rule requiring anyone—British or otherwise—to curtsy or bow to a royal. It’s an optional gesture of respect and tradition, not a legal or enforced requirement.

Do royal women curtsy to each other?

Traditionally, yes—based on hierarchy and precedence, royal women may curtsy to those of higher rank, but this often depends on who is present and the current positions within the family. The rules are updated as titles and circumstances change.

What happens if someone doesn’t curtsy?

Nothing formal. While it may be perceived as rude or unconventional in certain circles, especially by traditionalists, the royals will not react negatively and no penalty exists. Many high-profile figures have politely declined to curtsy in the past.

How should you curtsy if you want to?

Etiquette experts recommend a modest, controlled bob of the back leg, with the head gently bowed and hands at your side. Dramatic or sweeping gestures are discouraged.

Is curtsying only for women?

Traditionally, yes. Men usually perform a respectful neck bow instead. However, anyone may greet as they choose; a handshake is also acceptable.

Conclusion: Royal Curtsy as a Living Tradition

The royal curtsy remains a living symbol of the monarchy’s history and evolving customs. Though surrounded by myth and popular misunderstanding, the reality is far more nuanced—neither required nor dismissed, it persists as a gesture of choice, layered with tradition, familial hierarchy, and changing times. Whether on the balcony at Buckingham Palace or in the imaginations of royal-watchers around the world, the curtsy continues to capture the complex dance of monarchy, manners, and modernity.