Joanna Gaines Shares Sweet Bullying Advice for Her Son

How the Fixer Upper star turned her son's lunch table struggles into a beautiful lesson about heritage and kindness.

By Medha deb
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Joanna Gaines Reveals Her 7-Year-Old Son Was Bullied at the Lunch Table

Joanna Gaines, the beloved television personality from Fixer Upper, has long been an advocate for kindness and empathy in parenting. Her journey toward these values began with her own challenging childhood experiences, and now she’s passing down crucial lessons to her children. Recently, the mother of five opened up about a touching moment with her youngest son, Crew, who is seven years old, and how she guided him through a difficult situation that many children face in schools across the country.

A Familiar Echo from the Past

During an exclusive interview with Delish‘s Editorial Director Joanna Saltz, Gaines shared an intimate moment that connected her own childhood trauma with her son’s recent experience at school. She explained how Crew came home after being teased by his classmates for bringing seaweed to lunch—a traditional Korean dish that reflects his family’s cultural heritage. This moment seemed to trigger Gaines’s own memories of being bullied for her ethnicity and the foods her family prepared.

What makes this story particularly powerful is not the bullying itself, but how Gaines responded to her son with wisdom and encouragement. Rather than encouraging him to hide or change who he is, she recognized this as a teaching moment and an opportunity to help him embrace his identity with pride.

The Advice That Changed Everything

Gaines recalled the conversation she had with Crew: “The other day, my sweet boy came home and said, ‘Everyone made fun of me for bringing seaweed to school, so I’m going to go to lunch next week and bring everyone a packet, and we’re going to make it fun.’ I remember all the kids would make fun of me, like, ‘Oh, your food stinks,'” she explained, connecting the dots to her own childhood experiences.

Rather than allowing her son to internalize the negativity, Gaines seized the opportunity to instill confidence and pride in him. She told Crew: “I’m like, ‘Crew, don’t ever lose this—This is the most beautiful thing about you.’ I told him we’re going to work through this, and your friends are going to love this because they’re going to know the story.”

This approach demonstrates a sophisticated understanding of childhood psychology and identity development. Instead of advising her son to avoid bringing traditional food to school, Gaines encouraged him to own his heritage and share it with others, transforming a moment of shame into an opportunity for cultural celebration and education.

Celebrating Cultural Heritage Through Food

One of the most beautiful aspects of Gaines’s parenting philosophy is how she uses food as a vehicle for preserving family traditions and cultural identity. She takes tremendous pride in the fact that her children’s favorite foods are Lebanese and Korean dishes—cuisines that connect them to their great-grandparents and ancestral heritage.

Gaines’s mother is Korean, and her father was of Lebanese-German heritage, making her children’s relationship with food especially significant. Despite being far removed from their relatives and never having met their great-grandparents, Joanna has made it her mission to ensure that her children understand and appreciate their cultural story through the meals they eat.

“My favorite thing about my kiddos is that their favorite food is Lebanese food and Korean food,” Gaines explained with obvious pride. “As far removed as it as they are from it—they never even met their great grandparents, they weren’t alive—they know their story and their tradition through food is what I get to keep alive. It’s such an honor.”

Taking Heritage to the Next Level: A Family Trip to Korea

Gaines’s commitment to cultural preservation extends beyond the dinner table. Two years ago, she took her entire family to Korea so that her children could experience their heritage firsthand. This decision reflects her belief that cultural identity is not something to be hidden or minimized, but celebrated and explored.

During their trip, something remarkable happened that perfectly encapsulates Joanna’s parenting mission. She noticed that when her children—who don’t look ethnically Korean to outsiders—were eating traditional Korean dishes like kimchi tofu soup and seaweed soup, people at nearby tables would approach them with curiosity. These onlookers were struck by the sight of what appeared to be American children eating authentic Korean cuisine with complete comfort and familiarity.

“I remember people coming up to our table because all my kids don’t look Korean, but they were eating kimchi tofu soup, seaweed soup, and they were like, we never see American people eat like that,” Gaines recounted. “And I’m like, well, my mother fed them this since they were very little. So that to them is very normal food.”

This anecdote reveals something profound about Joanna’s parenting approach. By introducing her children to traditional cuisines from a young age and normalizing these foods within her household, she has created an environment where her kids naturally embrace their cultural heritage without question or embarrassment. The Korean food is not something exotic or different to them—it’s simply what families eat.

From Personal Pain to Parental Wisdom

Joanna Gaines’s journey as a parent has been deeply informed by her own childhood experiences. Growing up with a Korean mother and Caucasian father in Rose Hill, Kansas, where she was among very few Asian students, Gaines faced relentless teasing about her ethnicity and the food she brought to school. These experiences left deep emotional scars that shaped how she sees herself and, eventually, how she approaches parenting.

In interviews, Gaines has spoken openly about how being bullied for her Asian heritage made her question who she was. She felt pressured to hide parts of her identity that weren’t accepted by her peers. However, as an adult, she has reframed these painful experiences as valuable lessons that inform her parenting decisions.

By responding to Crew’s bullying experience with encouragement rather than avoidance, Gaines is breaking the cycle. She’s teaching her son something she wishes someone had taught her at his age: that his heritage is not something to hide or be ashamed of, but something to celebrate and share with others.

The Broader Message About Kindness and Acceptance

Beyond the specific story of Crew and his seaweed lunch, Joanna Gaines has been vocal about teaching all her children to recognize and support others who are being excluded or bullied. She has shared that she intentionally teaches her kids to look for the child on the playground who isn’t playing with anyone, or the kid in the lunchroom sitting alone, and to reach out with friendship and inclusion.

This proactive approach to kindness stems from Gaines’s own experience as someone who felt isolated and unwelcome. She understands the power of a single act of kindness and inclusion, and she wants her children to be the people who provide that lifeline to others. In a world where bullying remains a significant issue for many young people, Gaines’s emphasis on active kindness and cultural celebration offers a refreshing counterpoint to the shame-based responses that often characterize bullying narratives.

Parenting with Purpose and Intention

Joanna Gaines has established herself as a parent willing to be intentional about her family’s values and traditions. With five children—Drake, Ella, Duke, Emmie, and Crew—she has had ample opportunity to refine her parenting philosophy. Her oldest son Drake is now in college, and her daughter Ella recently graduated high school, suggesting that Gaines’s earlier parenting decisions have helped shape confident, well-adjusted young adults.

The guidance she offers her youngest son represents years of accumulated wisdom and self-reflection. It’s not a quick fix or a simple platitude, but rather a thoughtful response that validates Crew’s feelings while redirecting his narrative toward pride and agency. By suggesting that he could bring seaweed for everyone to try, Gaines empowered her son to become an educator and ambassador for his own culture, transforming a moment of shame into an opportunity for connection.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: How did Joanna Gaines experience bullying as a child?

A: Growing up in Kansas as one of very few Asian students, Joanna Gaines was bullied for her Korean heritage and the traditional foods she brought to school. She struggled with self-confidence and social anxiety, even to the point of hiding in the bathroom rather than facing the lunchroom during her sophomore year of high school.

Q: What advice did Joanna give her son Crew about being bullied?

A: Instead of encouraging her son to avoid bringing traditional Korean food to school, Joanna advised him to embrace his heritage and share it with his classmates. She suggested he bring seaweed packets for everyone so they could understand the story behind the food, transforming shame into celebration.

Q: How does Joanna Gaines use food to preserve family heritage?

A: Gaines has made Korean and Lebanese cuisines central to her family’s daily life, even though her children are far removed from their ancestors. She introduced these foods when her children were young so they would feel normal and familiar, and she even took her family to Korea to experience the culture firsthand.

Q: What is Joanna Gaines’s broader parenting philosophy regarding bullying?

A: Gaines teaches her children to actively look for and include kids who are being excluded or bullied. She encourages them to reach out to children sitting alone on the playground or in the lunchroom, promoting a culture of kindness and inclusion within their social circles.

Q: Why is cultural identity important to Joanna Gaines as a parent?

A: Having experienced rejection for her own cultural identity as a child, Gaines believes it’s essential to help her children embrace and celebrate their heritage. She sees food, traditions, and direct cultural experiences as ways to help her children develop a strong sense of who they are.

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